1. When a 15-month-old child hears an important adult in her life utter something to the effect of...Vacation. Relaxation. Out of state. Oh, I don't know...8 hour car ride, it immediately triggers a physiological response that sets the next group of four yet-to-emerge teeth into a frenzied race to the top of the gums to see who can emerge first.
This aforementioned physiological response will set said 15-month-old into a wild fit of screaming, crying with actual tears, whining, lots of "eh, eh, eh, eh, EH's" and will drive mother of said infant virtually insane while traveling to the much-anticipated vacation destination.
2. A regimen of both Tylenol and Motrin is not always as effective, cool, and fun as it sounds. For your teething child, of course. Now that I think about it, a Tylenol and Motrin regimen for myself probably would have been a genius idea. Darn hindsight...
3. All mothers of small infants need to RUN, not walk, to their doctor's office prior to departure when setting out on a road trip and demand a prescription for Xanax. Seriously.
2. Sister-in-laws are the bomb shizzle fo nizzle lifesavers of the universe.
3. Once a sister-in-law offers to sit in the seat next to the cranky, drugged up child that was previously occupied by a mama whose head was about to do this...
... and offers to let the mama sit in the very front seat instead, one's quality of life immediately improves by 104%. Amazing.
4. Never, I repeat NEVER, leave your child's "we only use them during sleep times" pacifiers in the trunk "because we only use them during sleep times."
5. You will break more rules on vacation than you ever thought possible. Rules to be broken include, but are not limited to: the no pacifiers during awake times rule, the you can scream all you want but you must eat all your meals in your high chair and not in someone's lap rule, the no you cannot have more milk - you've already had 3 sippy cups of milk, you will eat some food and you will eat it NOW rule, and the you only get to watch Barney once a day rule.
6. Parents whose teething children who are instantly calmed by Barney and Veggie Tales will have the following songs stuck in their heads approximately 3 hours after arriving at the destination: "Down on Grandpa's Farm," "The Annoying Yellow Blanket song" by Stupid Baby Bop, "Flying in an Airplane," and let's not forget the classic..."Oh, Where is My Hairbrush." If you did not already have every single ever lovin' lyric to each of these songs engrained in your memory before you left on your trip, don't worry. They'll all be there by the time you get back home. Every. Single. Annoying. WORD.
7. Early bedtimes (for kids and parents) are essential.
8. Day 2 will be much better. And so will every day after that.
9. Going nearly an entire week without cooking, cleaning, doing laundry, loading (or not loading) the dishwasher, and running errands is something I think I might take up on a more regular basis. That was awesome.
10. Getting away from the phone, the bills, the computer, WORK, and even my little house and my town was phenomenal. We're talking hiking, gorgeous gardens with tiny little waterfalls and tons of pretty flowers, canoeing, eating delicious foods, finishing two books, seeing new places, walking nearly everywhere I went, and just being able to RELAX was more than worth the craptastic start of our journey.
I'm already daydreaming about next summer's getaway...
(This post is a part of Mama Kat's Thursday Writer's Workshop. Although the prompt I chose was to recap a day in your life, I decided to cheat a teensy bit and recap a week. I know - I'm a rebel.)